The following names have been changed to protect the identities of those mentioned in this blog.
Women are like chess players. Every move you make is based on strategy, and if you make the wrong moves then eventually you will be checkmated. At this particular chess match, my pawns and knights were in position to win the contest. I had spent hours investing my own time to be in the check situation. I could of had a fool's mate with the most experienced and easy opponent around.
I don't know whose idea this was; my friend's or mines. He simply asked her on MySpace if she remembered me. I was on the phone with Roxy for two hours straight talking about literally anything. I could have possibly talked about why the sky is blue for twenty minutes. My eyes were falling down like a garage door slowly enclosing. My body's energy was depleted of its physical strength to motion. I can't believe from the sound of Roxy's adorable voice that she can live without sleep at night. I wasn't even Roxy's interest to begin with. She had an old school crush for my friend who introduced us. One day visiting his old neighborhood became another day of her adding me on MySpace and talking on the phone. Five hours was all I had left until History class began.
I managed to move one of my rooks to capture three of her pawns in succession. She agreed to meet up for a date. Her original plans were to hang out with her friend until I asked. Roxy wore incredibly short jeans with long knee high socks, because I jokingly requested it. At the mall, our hands were locked in super glue. Whatever lotion she used made our palms awkwardly moist. I should have done something to solve the matter. Roxy's pawn captured my bishop.
The long walk around a circumference mall killed time until the movie started. I knew I should never go to a movie on the first date, but I did anyways. The reasoning behind it is that a movie on the first date limits the vocal interaction you have with him/her. I guess I didn't care, because of the excruciating long phone calls beforehand. She put her head on my shoulder as we watched the animated romantic movie, WALL-E. I felt her left hand slowly touch the edge of my thigh and then it continued upward. The massage feeling gave me a thrill that teased my hormones. I put my right hand on her unconcealed thigh to mimic her actions. I kissed her on the forehead. Roxy gives me an excuse that she doesn't kiss guys anymore, because their means of kissing isn't adequate for her. She didn't even give me a try for my lips to meet hers completely. Two more of my pawns are taken from me. I stopped her hand so I can play hard to get. It ruined the moment as she pulled back. It was an accident that left my other bishop defenseless.
After the movie, we hanged out for a little longer. The climax resulted in this question, "Would you go to my house after?"
Roxy replied, "Yeah, if your parents allowed it."
My pawns and knights were in position to pull a fool's mate. At the time I didn't know this was a subtle hint that she wanted to "go to my house to fool around, but saying so would deem her as a slut". She went home after that day. This was before I learned the "game". If I knew it at the time I met her, then honestly a lot would have happened indeed. I talked to her a couple more times with the same long tiring infatuated conversations. Roxy told me she wanted to see many guys so she can have more "fun". I heard a lot of stories of her acting in a promiscuous manner. I heard from the friend who introduced us, from another friend who she flirted with, and especially from herself. It must have been a good thing after all. Her list of men she messed around with ranged from different ethnicities to different states. I know, because she told me over the phone. I had a fool's mate opportunity, but she got me into a swindle instead. I put my king down flat on the chessboard.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Oddity
The following names have been changed to protect the identities of those mentioned in this blog.
Who cares? This message is supposed to grab anyone's attention. It worked for others and it can work for me too. However, I'm doing this all wrong. It's supposed to be used in real life and there's so much more to it. It's going to lose its credibility, because in person I can convey a friendly confident attitude. Who cares right? There are millions of fishes in the sea. If I send this message then nothing bad will happen right. I don't think anything will happen. What are the odds that she would see me in real life anyways? Debating with your conscious is like debating against a magic 8-ball. You know the right answer deep down inside, but you keep asking yourself until you finally make the choice you desire. Whoever made the proverb, "curiosity killed the cat" must relate to my story.
My short message was random and neutral. Its purpose was to simply engage in a conversation without perceiving myself as a threat. I clicked the send tab. It must of been months until I found out what reality had in stored for me. My friend, Seth, called me up out of no where to tell me the good news. He asked me if I knew his cousin, Lisa, because she told him about my old message. I didn't know who Lisa was or what he was talking about. Then a cartoon cloud floated over my head to make it apparent who it was. It was that girl I came across with dozens of clicks. I seriously want to know the statistic of the odds of this happening. He then tells me that she was curious too. I never attained a reply from her, but for some reason she wanted to meet me. I guess the message worked after all. That thought diminished in a split second, until he told me she negatively thought it was out of the ordinary. I knew something bad was going to happen from there.
In the next week or two, I was hanging out with Seth at his house. He tells me that his cousin is coming over today. I had a feeling she wouldn't come over, because it was that gut feeling. Guess what happened next? She came over. I opened the door to greet her and walked her upstairs into Seth's room. I sat down two feet away from her on the bed. I couldn't believe what was happening. The girl, who I sent a digital message to months ago, was right next to me in person. It was my chance to socially shine, but there was one dilemma. I have not been in the "game" for months. My skills were considerably rusty. After the small talk in the room, she gave me a ride to my house down the street. The conversation I implemented during the drive was banter and meaningless. I talked about movies for thirty minutes when I was supposed to build attraction and not try to create rapport prematurely. My gut was telling me this was going no where. Then the unthinkable emerged from the vault of screw ups. She handed me her cell phone to show me some interesting pictures, but she forgot I had it in my hand. It was too late to stop her as she drove away from my house. I went inside my room thinking about how weird this has become. I exacerbated the situation indeed, but I knew I had to give her the phone somehow. I called her house phone a couple of times, but no answer. After a few minutes of stress, she finally picked up. There was no opportunity for her to retrieve her cell phone that night, so we decided that the mourning would suffice. She came back around the time I was late for class. She offered a ride to my school while we still had meaningless banter conversation in the car.
After the incident, I came to a conclusion in my train of thoughts. Bottom line is, never take a woman's cell phone no matter what the reason is. It doesn't matter if it's on purpose or by accident. It doesn't matter if the cell phone is cheap or expensive. The principle is that taking a woman's cell phone is like taking her makeup or her purse. Yet, I thought I would have redemption. Forgive and forget about the escapade maybe? The problem was not the initial message that started this fiasco. If a woman wants to meet a guy and take her own time to meet the person in real life, then that's a sign of interest. When I met her in person, I didn't know what to do. My mentor would be kicking himself, but he would also say it's no big deal. When I ventured into the "game", I wanted situations like this one to never happen again. I've come to an understanding that whatever I do, there will be consequences either good or bad. I made the decision to send the message, with a warning from my conscious that it may affect me in the future. I also made the decision to stop the "game" for a while and not convey my social skills to her that day. I also made the mistake of taking her cell phone. It doesn't matter if we would have hit it off or not despite the cell phone incident. What matters is that I learned that anything can happen. What are the odds of that?
Who cares? This message is supposed to grab anyone's attention. It worked for others and it can work for me too. However, I'm doing this all wrong. It's supposed to be used in real life and there's so much more to it. It's going to lose its credibility, because in person I can convey a friendly confident attitude. Who cares right? There are millions of fishes in the sea. If I send this message then nothing bad will happen right. I don't think anything will happen. What are the odds that she would see me in real life anyways? Debating with your conscious is like debating against a magic 8-ball. You know the right answer deep down inside, but you keep asking yourself until you finally make the choice you desire. Whoever made the proverb, "curiosity killed the cat" must relate to my story.
My short message was random and neutral. Its purpose was to simply engage in a conversation without perceiving myself as a threat. I clicked the send tab. It must of been months until I found out what reality had in stored for me. My friend, Seth, called me up out of no where to tell me the good news. He asked me if I knew his cousin, Lisa, because she told him about my old message. I didn't know who Lisa was or what he was talking about. Then a cartoon cloud floated over my head to make it apparent who it was. It was that girl I came across with dozens of clicks. I seriously want to know the statistic of the odds of this happening. He then tells me that she was curious too. I never attained a reply from her, but for some reason she wanted to meet me. I guess the message worked after all. That thought diminished in a split second, until he told me she negatively thought it was out of the ordinary. I knew something bad was going to happen from there.
In the next week or two, I was hanging out with Seth at his house. He tells me that his cousin is coming over today. I had a feeling she wouldn't come over, because it was that gut feeling. Guess what happened next? She came over. I opened the door to greet her and walked her upstairs into Seth's room. I sat down two feet away from her on the bed. I couldn't believe what was happening. The girl, who I sent a digital message to months ago, was right next to me in person. It was my chance to socially shine, but there was one dilemma. I have not been in the "game" for months. My skills were considerably rusty. After the small talk in the room, she gave me a ride to my house down the street. The conversation I implemented during the drive was banter and meaningless. I talked about movies for thirty minutes when I was supposed to build attraction and not try to create rapport prematurely. My gut was telling me this was going no where. Then the unthinkable emerged from the vault of screw ups. She handed me her cell phone to show me some interesting pictures, but she forgot I had it in my hand. It was too late to stop her as she drove away from my house. I went inside my room thinking about how weird this has become. I exacerbated the situation indeed, but I knew I had to give her the phone somehow. I called her house phone a couple of times, but no answer. After a few minutes of stress, she finally picked up. There was no opportunity for her to retrieve her cell phone that night, so we decided that the mourning would suffice. She came back around the time I was late for class. She offered a ride to my school while we still had meaningless banter conversation in the car.
After the incident, I came to a conclusion in my train of thoughts. Bottom line is, never take a woman's cell phone no matter what the reason is. It doesn't matter if it's on purpose or by accident. It doesn't matter if the cell phone is cheap or expensive. The principle is that taking a woman's cell phone is like taking her makeup or her purse. Yet, I thought I would have redemption. Forgive and forget about the escapade maybe? The problem was not the initial message that started this fiasco. If a woman wants to meet a guy and take her own time to meet the person in real life, then that's a sign of interest. When I met her in person, I didn't know what to do. My mentor would be kicking himself, but he would also say it's no big deal. When I ventured into the "game", I wanted situations like this one to never happen again. I've come to an understanding that whatever I do, there will be consequences either good or bad. I made the decision to send the message, with a warning from my conscious that it may affect me in the future. I also made the decision to stop the "game" for a while and not convey my social skills to her that day. I also made the mistake of taking her cell phone. It doesn't matter if we would have hit it off or not despite the cell phone incident. What matters is that I learned that anything can happen. What are the odds of that?
Monday, May 25, 2009
Monterrey since the Third Grade
The buzzing sound only means one thing to my ear in the mourning; someone is calling me. I received an invitation to travel to Monterrey with my friend, his girlfriend, and her younger brother. The last time I went there was on a third grade field trip to go whale watching and visit the aquarium. The bus we took was supposedly an upper class version with cushion seats and a single bathroom. The window seat was the best, because I can view the vast scenery. I remember jumping on a boat for the first time at Monterrey. The cold wind brushes against my face as I hold onto the silver railings. Motion of the boat's speed causes my throat to spill out hot spew. Waves started to crush vigorously while I gazed at the uncontrollable sea. There goes an enormous whale jumping and plunging into the blue water ten miles away. I was impressed by the whale's magnificent ability to maneuver. It's a shame that I don't recall much of the trip to the aquarium. It's very vague in detail.
Today was a different story indeed. There was a brick wall housing a clothing store filled with Monterrey/beach apparel. The younger brother is a photographer equipped with an expensive camera that captures images superbly. I posted against the brick wall to see what he can do for future photo shoots. After walking around foggy Monterrey, we settled at a sea food restaurant. The creamy clam chowder in a soft bread bowl is delicious. Next on today's list was going to my friend's cousins' Memorial Day BBQ. His cousin helped me alternate my iphone; while I ate BBQ coated chicken, spice tingling hot dogs, and to top it off with a toothsome root beer float. After all the walking in Monterrey, this feast was absolutely a treat. In third grade, I would have never guessed the possibilities of technology today. Super Nintendo or the Sega Genesis was top of the line in my childhood. Now its things like the computer, the Xbox, and the cell phone that makes anything possible.
Today was a different story indeed. There was a brick wall housing a clothing store filled with Monterrey/beach apparel. The younger brother is a photographer equipped with an expensive camera that captures images superbly. I posted against the brick wall to see what he can do for future photo shoots. After walking around foggy Monterrey, we settled at a sea food restaurant. The creamy clam chowder in a soft bread bowl is delicious. Next on today's list was going to my friend's cousins' Memorial Day BBQ. His cousin helped me alternate my iphone; while I ate BBQ coated chicken, spice tingling hot dogs, and to top it off with a toothsome root beer float. After all the walking in Monterrey, this feast was absolutely a treat. In third grade, I would have never guessed the possibilities of technology today. Super Nintendo or the Sega Genesis was top of the line in my childhood. Now its things like the computer, the Xbox, and the cell phone that makes anything possible.
Party Once Again
Opened my eyes around twelve thirty even though my body was glued to the bed. My brother knocked on my door to ask me if I wanted to go Mike's birthday party. As time went by, the area we visited had a pleasant neighborhood. I doubt anyone would get mugged here going home late at night. I ate some tasty food, watched television, and played basketball at the park nearby. When I went home around twelve at night, I was drained to even write in my blog. I had to make it up by posting two today. I would carry my laptop with me twenty four/seven, but I haven't ordered a replacement battery yet. I'm dependent on my power cord and if it somehow gets pulled, then it would completely turn off. For now, I have my trusty iphone to jot down notes.
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Rain Drop
I never heard of Coyote Point Park before this trip to San Francisco. My friend's uncle's birthday was depicted as a fun normal day outdoors; however, sprinkles of rain changed plans. The black sleek Bimmer earned its hard work of a waxing, so we turned around. We ended up at my friend's girlfriend's grandma's birthday party instead. My stomach started to growl like a defensive lion. I ate some phenomenal Filipino cuisine such as Pancit Palabok and Dinuguan.
I sparked up a conversation with my friend's cousin about our iphones. He explained to me the wonders of the iphone that many people don't exploit. He can attain the best applications for free and be able to customize the iphone with themes under a jailbreak reprogramming. My wish for the next generation iphone was to have video recording capabilities. He showed me an app that did that very thing, due to a third party program that Apple didn't expose.
After the party, I was left with my thoughts. I thought about my use of vocabulary in my blogs. Can I write with elaborate words that pertain to a general audience? I'll do my best, but not for any cynic or biased critic. In other words, I'll try to make my blogs simple and easy to understand.
I sparked up a conversation with my friend's cousin about our iphones. He explained to me the wonders of the iphone that many people don't exploit. He can attain the best applications for free and be able to customize the iphone with themes under a jailbreak reprogramming. My wish for the next generation iphone was to have video recording capabilities. He showed me an app that did that very thing, due to a third party program that Apple didn't expose.
After the party, I was left with my thoughts. I thought about my use of vocabulary in my blogs. Can I write with elaborate words that pertain to a general audience? I'll do my best, but not for any cynic or biased critic. In other words, I'll try to make my blogs simple and easy to understand.
Friday, May 22, 2009
Amazing Game
Today, I stayed home and watched game two of the Cleveland Cavaliers versus the Orlando Magic. The first half became a close and tedious battle between the eager clubs. The Cavaliers started the third quarter by leading in double digits; however, the Magic made a sensational comeback. At the fourth quarter, Hedo Turkoglu made a two-point field goal to give the Magic a hard-fought lead. At the timeout, I pondered if Lebron James would make a miracle clutch basket in comparison of Michael Jordan. With a second left in regulation, superstar Lebron James accomplished the most amazing moment in Cleveland Cavaliers history. Mo Williams inbounded the ball quickly to Lebron James (who was well guarded by would-be Magic hero Hedo Turkoglu) and made a three-point field goal to defeat the Orlando Magic. I yelled, "What the heck, wow!" in excitement.
It's only an even series, one to one, but I prefer Cleveland to win the Eastern Conference Championship. I want to see last year's most valuable player Kobe Bryant against this year's most valuable player Lebron James in a match for a championship and for bragging rights for the best player in the world. If the Denver Nuggets wins then I would enjoy seeing Carmelo Anthony against Lebron James in reminiscent of their high school championship days. If the Los Angelos Lakers and the Orlando Magic win then I would want to see Adam Morrison against J.J. Redick, even though they are benched. Overall in my opinion, in order for Lebron James to be compared to Michael Jordan then he would need to earn championships. I believe Lebron James has a chance to make it to the finals, but it's going to be a tough voyage against the Orlando Magic; the Denver Nuggets or the Los Angelos Lakers.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Blog Happily
I've posted different types of blogs so far. I've written an interview, a poem, a movie review, and some stories of my life. I want my blogs to be diverse and admired to a wide variety of people. I want it to range from different ages, races, and genders. I want to write in a way that brings familiarity and a sense of realism. I want my readers to enjoy my content and learn from my own experiences. I want my reader's to keep guessing what I'll post next. I want to captivate a mesmerizing imagination that pulls people into my blogs as if they were present. I received a text message the other day in which my friend proclaimed, "Wow dude, your blog completely shocked me." I also attained an email declaring, "Interesting blog you got! You have a great writing style so far- funny, conversation, clever but doesn't seem like you're trying too hard." I want to be confident and charismatic in my line of work. I just want to write happily.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Until Summer School
I'll keep this short and simple. The year has gone by really fast. I'm out of school until late June where I'll be taking summer school. Until then, I plan to do many things and I'll report them in my blogs. I hope my thoughts and experiences will help me become an elite writer before I undergo English 1c. In conclusion, I wish everyone a happy productive summer. Keep writing and keep reading.
Monday, May 18, 2009
A Drunk's Phantasm
Welcome to your first taste of reality's tumbles and stumbles in an unstoppable vacuum of puzzles. Everything is the exact same of course, but not for a drunk's concern. Any man or women can see what I mean. We are imprisoned in our self-conscious confinement until the warden gives us a drink or two or three or whatever drink depends to be free. Let go anything logical in exchange for the "feeling". Be careful not to crash into the negative threshold of another drunk or sobers' fence. It can possibly lead to much turmoil no matter whatever reason, because you must remember; there's no logic. You are seemed hilarious or dumb by spectators, but maybe not in your own view. This is due to the inhibition of the "feeling". Every touch feels vibration. Every smell feels foreign. Every taste feels ambrosial. Every hearing feels compelling. Every sight feels euphoric. This is why we escape the very grip of reality into paradise. A paradise that's located on a small island ten miles near abstemious country. Do you still feel it? Maybe one shot isn't enough for a newbie. Well at least I have your full attention now. After agreeing to these terms and understanding that we are not liable for any injuries, you need a twenty one and over green card to travel to the island. Maybe we'll let you in under some circumstances since you are underage. A simple bribe would suffice or... what the heck, why not? You're a cool person. Oh, and one last thing. Remain responsible while you have fun under the sun.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
That Is Something I Would Not Want to Occur
I'll be honest with the audience. I have been very busy, too busy to write in my blog about something in distinct detail. That would take me an hour or two maybe. Late at night when I post my entry I'm vastly exhausted from what I do in the day. What I did today was go to a party; nothing special or miraculous about the festivities rather than having something to do. That's the point indeed. I have a blog that I'm supposed to be dedicated to. It does not matter if nothing occurred today or if something would occur today. I should take at least five minutes of my time to write at least a sentence or a few. My blog is my duty, a duty to write. If football players stopped playing in the middle of the field during the Super Bowl then the masses would riot. If garbage men halted service of handling people's dirty problems then I'm sure streets would pile aversion. If the sun decided that the solar system is not worth its time of day then I'm sure the moon would join him in extraction; that will indeed be a catastrophe. So I say to myself, if I stop writing in my blog then my dedication will indubitably perish. That is something I would not want to occur.
Saturday, May 16, 2009
I Lost More Than Reputation. I Lost a Friend
The following names have been changed to protect the identities of those mentioned in this blog.
It didn’t take me years to finally unveil my side of the story. This was always on my mind and as I look back to it; I find it funny. It’s funny how things tend to happen.
"Okay here's the bet. Devin will give you a 100 dollar bill if you go up to Anna and ask her out," says Phil.
I guess Phil's motivation was to stir up some fun, while everyone did nothing productive in P.E. class.
"Yeah I will, look see it's a 100 dollars," Devin replies, while displaying the gimmick money.
That is stupid as I thought to myself. That thing doesn't even look real; it's too small to be real.
I took it as a reason though; a reason to talk to her. I slowly gained momentum to walk up to a crowd of surrounding people. On the cement bed in front of the concrete facade, she sat down restless. It was my only opportunity before school ended.
Let's go back several months before this tragic day. I find myself sitting down at an assigned seat that Ms. Gustoff devised. Beside me was little Kathy and opposite to my position was Anna. I didn't know anyone else that day except for my neighbor, Oakley, who sat across the room. I can hardly remember the exact dialogues we had, but I do remember how I felt. I felt happy to see smiles and laughter in my group. The seven days of the week, for an hour and thirty minutes, became our chill time together. It’s safe to say I actually liked her. In that middle school class, I always broke out of my shell to be a comedian along side Oakley. My own hidden agenda might have been to grab her attention. I didn’t need to in order for her to like me, but that was me back then. Like many people who transition to another school, you have an option to become either popular or stay the same. We went separate ways. The relationship dwindled like an autumn leaf stomped on by a herd of unconscious citizens. Ms. Gustoff changed the seating arrangements monthly as Anna and I departed. I wished for the winning lottery ticket that reunited us, but I was a fool. I should have went up to her or talked to her outside of class. That’s how I was back then. We went from strangers to friends to acquaintances to strangers once again.
My body was circled by everyone’s curiosity. They knew what was going to happen. Some instigated the situation and some made it a mockery. I couldn’t spill out the words out of my mouth. That is if I had any words to really spill out. I did not know what to say.
“Will you go out with me,” I struggled to pronounce. The anticipation of Anna’s reaction exacerbated my lost emotion.
“No,” Anna sincerely spoke as she looked up.
We did part ways for good. There were numerous encounters of people who asked me about that day. “I heard you were on your knees and you were crying,” someone asked me once. I simply replied that it didn’t happen that way. Some people were not present that day and heard a different perspective. Some were there that day and still fabricated an alternate story.
The last class I had with Anna was in my senior year, but it was too late to reconcile. I wish I at least tried though. Who knows if we could erase the past and begin a new relationship? I find it funny in retrospective that I was that person. I was that person who wanted a girl's attention, but in some cases turned comedian into clown. I was that person who wanted to talk to her before school ended, while originating a reputation known as, “The guy who went up to Anna.” I was that person who lost a friend. It’s funny how I changed. It’s funny how people don’t know the truth. It’s funny that things tend to happen.
It didn’t take me years to finally unveil my side of the story. This was always on my mind and as I look back to it; I find it funny. It’s funny how things tend to happen.
"Okay here's the bet. Devin will give you a 100 dollar bill if you go up to Anna and ask her out," says Phil.
I guess Phil's motivation was to stir up some fun, while everyone did nothing productive in P.E. class.
"Yeah I will, look see it's a 100 dollars," Devin replies, while displaying the gimmick money.
That is stupid as I thought to myself. That thing doesn't even look real; it's too small to be real.
I took it as a reason though; a reason to talk to her. I slowly gained momentum to walk up to a crowd of surrounding people. On the cement bed in front of the concrete facade, she sat down restless. It was my only opportunity before school ended.
Let's go back several months before this tragic day. I find myself sitting down at an assigned seat that Ms. Gustoff devised. Beside me was little Kathy and opposite to my position was Anna. I didn't know anyone else that day except for my neighbor, Oakley, who sat across the room. I can hardly remember the exact dialogues we had, but I do remember how I felt. I felt happy to see smiles and laughter in my group. The seven days of the week, for an hour and thirty minutes, became our chill time together. It’s safe to say I actually liked her. In that middle school class, I always broke out of my shell to be a comedian along side Oakley. My own hidden agenda might have been to grab her attention. I didn’t need to in order for her to like me, but that was me back then. Like many people who transition to another school, you have an option to become either popular or stay the same. We went separate ways. The relationship dwindled like an autumn leaf stomped on by a herd of unconscious citizens. Ms. Gustoff changed the seating arrangements monthly as Anna and I departed. I wished for the winning lottery ticket that reunited us, but I was a fool. I should have went up to her or talked to her outside of class. That’s how I was back then. We went from strangers to friends to acquaintances to strangers once again.
My body was circled by everyone’s curiosity. They knew what was going to happen. Some instigated the situation and some made it a mockery. I couldn’t spill out the words out of my mouth. That is if I had any words to really spill out. I did not know what to say.
“Will you go out with me,” I struggled to pronounce. The anticipation of Anna’s reaction exacerbated my lost emotion.
“No,” Anna sincerely spoke as she looked up.
We did part ways for good. There were numerous encounters of people who asked me about that day. “I heard you were on your knees and you were crying,” someone asked me once. I simply replied that it didn’t happen that way. Some people were not present that day and heard a different perspective. Some were there that day and still fabricated an alternate story.
The last class I had with Anna was in my senior year, but it was too late to reconcile. I wish I at least tried though. Who knows if we could erase the past and begin a new relationship? I find it funny in retrospective that I was that person. I was that person who wanted a girl's attention, but in some cases turned comedian into clown. I was that person who wanted to talk to her before school ended, while originating a reputation known as, “The guy who went up to Anna.” I was that person who lost a friend. It’s funny how I changed. It’s funny how people don’t know the truth. It’s funny that things tend to happen.
Friday, May 15, 2009
Poem: Hydoken
The street is our stage
Fill the meter called rage
we fight to the last round
you win! Elates that very sound
Wet palms clutch my supervisor
I beg for another chance to be a riser
if given that opening for a counter uppercut
your door for a win is definitely shut
-Potential
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Interview: The Rhyme Crusaders
In high school I met three men who would later assemble the Underground Hip Hop group, Rhyme Crusaders. For months, I've witnessed their hard work and dedication to music in Rythmatical's studio. It's where I spend my days hanging out and writing too. The atmosphere is affected by their positive outlook, engaged minds, and laid back attitude. I strongly believe that they will succeed in what they do and it's only in a matter of time until I'm chilling in their tour bus. This is an exclusive interview of the Rhyme Crusaders. Rythmaical, Insomniac, and Havoc are the current members. This is their response.
Potential: What types of music do you guys like yourselves?
Rhyme Crusaders: We like everything really, except for Country and Gothic shit.
Potential: So what type of music are you guys aiming to make?
Rhyme Crusaders: A little Marvin Gay mixed with Tupac is what we try to create.
Potential: What made you think of the name Rhyme Crusaders?
Rythmatical: The Grouch's song, "Crusaders for Justice" inspired me to be on a rhyming mission.
Potential: Is there any special technique you have for writing your lyrics?
Rhyme Crusaders: Read some poetry books first, then start a freestyle session as a warm up and skat (skat is filling melodies in with words).
Potential: Creating beats takes time, patience, and persistence. On an average, how long does it take you to create a beat?
Rythmatical: It depends on how much time and effort you have. I've made beats within minutes to hours to days.
Insomniac: For me it takes about six to eight hours.
Potential: Do you believe that the best studio equipment matters or you can still make music without a lot of money to invest?
Insomniac: You can do work with the limited amount of equipment, but it depends on how well you use what you have to flip samples.
Potential: Define flipping?
Rhyme Crusaders: Taking a sample and making it your own. For us, we keep the same melody because the melody is what inspired us to make it into a beat.
Potential: Do you guys remember a time when you couldn't rap? How did you guys bounce back to rap?
Rythmatical: Before I was in high school. My cousin, Eric, started showing me scribble jam tapes of people battling. It inspired me.
Insomniac: I was at a party and I was feeling out of it so I wasn't really in my flow. Honestly I was too fucked up to focus.
Havoc: When Rythmatical made me come into his studio for the first time. He made me spit to some of his beats. Over a certain amount of time I liked to flow and I got better at it. I stuck with it.
Potential: If you can choose anyone to collaborate with, who would it be?
Rythmatical: I would collaborate with the Grouch when he was in his old school days. One Be Lo too, because their lyrical words tell truth.
Insomniac: J Dilla and living legends, because they were the first underground music I've listened to.
Havoc: Big L and 9th Wonder on the same track, and Rythmatical just so he won't get butt hurt lol.
Potential: In a couple of years, where do you guys see yourselves in music?
Rhyme Crusaders: We'll be at Iguanas for open mic and we'll rock the crowd!
Potential: Do you have any words of inspiration for fellow up and coming emcees?
Rythmatical: Be true to yourself; don't try to fall into anything. Create your own movement.
Insomniac: Stick with it and you'll get better.
Havoc: I can't say much for now, because I'm still coming up.
After the interview, the crew worked on a song while I wrote in my blog. My word of inspiration is that if you love something then you should go out there and embrace it. It takes desire and a lot of heart. Some people love writing and others love music.
Potential: What types of music do you guys like yourselves?
Rhyme Crusaders: We like everything really, except for Country and Gothic shit.
Potential: So what type of music are you guys aiming to make?
Rhyme Crusaders: A little Marvin Gay mixed with Tupac is what we try to create.
Potential: What made you think of the name Rhyme Crusaders?
Rythmatical: The Grouch's song, "Crusaders for Justice" inspired me to be on a rhyming mission.
Potential: Is there any special technique you have for writing your lyrics?
Rhyme Crusaders: Read some poetry books first, then start a freestyle session as a warm up and skat (skat is filling melodies in with words).
Potential: Creating beats takes time, patience, and persistence. On an average, how long does it take you to create a beat?
Rythmatical: It depends on how much time and effort you have. I've made beats within minutes to hours to days.
Insomniac: For me it takes about six to eight hours.
Potential: Do you believe that the best studio equipment matters or you can still make music without a lot of money to invest?
Insomniac: You can do work with the limited amount of equipment, but it depends on how well you use what you have to flip samples.
Potential: Define flipping?
Rhyme Crusaders: Taking a sample and making it your own. For us, we keep the same melody because the melody is what inspired us to make it into a beat.
Potential: Do you guys remember a time when you couldn't rap? How did you guys bounce back to rap?
Rythmatical: Before I was in high school. My cousin, Eric, started showing me scribble jam tapes of people battling. It inspired me.
Insomniac: I was at a party and I was feeling out of it so I wasn't really in my flow. Honestly I was too fucked up to focus.
Havoc: When Rythmatical made me come into his studio for the first time. He made me spit to some of his beats. Over a certain amount of time I liked to flow and I got better at it. I stuck with it.
Potential: If you can choose anyone to collaborate with, who would it be?
Rythmatical: I would collaborate with the Grouch when he was in his old school days. One Be Lo too, because their lyrical words tell truth.
Insomniac: J Dilla and living legends, because they were the first underground music I've listened to.
Havoc: Big L and 9th Wonder on the same track, and Rythmatical just so he won't get butt hurt lol.
Potential: In a couple of years, where do you guys see yourselves in music?
Rhyme Crusaders: We'll be at Iguanas for open mic and we'll rock the crowd!
Potential: Do you have any words of inspiration for fellow up and coming emcees?
Rythmatical: Be true to yourself; don't try to fall into anything. Create your own movement.
Insomniac: Stick with it and you'll get better.
Havoc: I can't say much for now, because I'm still coming up.
After the interview, the crew worked on a song while I wrote in my blog. My word of inspiration is that if you love something then you should go out there and embrace it. It takes desire and a lot of heart. Some people love writing and others love music.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Put First Things First Even If You Have a Bump On Your Forehead
When I'm ridiculously busy, I tend to put the most important affairs on my priority list. Today's number one priority is going to school to turn in my Guidance portfolio, which is worth 100 points. Shoot I was running late and I still needed to print out my papers. As soon as I finished I went straight to my class to turn in my work.
Girl #1: Oh my god, what's that bump on your forehead?
Me: Oh this, I got a mosquito bite yesterday.
Girl #1: What happened?
Me: I was playing basketball and I feel this slight pinch on my face. I said to myself, "what the heck." This mosquito was buzzing next to my eye.
Girl #1: That is really big.
Me: I know right. It's so weird.
Girl #1: did you get hit in the head?
Me: no it was a mosquito bite.
I walk towards my group to participate and gave my teacher my portfolio.
Girl #2: Potential isn't sexy anymore. Haha (When we did introductions in the first weeks of school, the teacher made us choose an adjective to associate with our name. I choose sexy.)
Girl #3: I think he heard you. Haha
Me: How so? I want to know. I always want to improve myself.
Girl #3: that bump is huge!
Me: I know right. You girls have long hair compared to mines. Don't you girls hate it when you have bad hair days?
Girl #3: Yeah... You should have covered it up? You should have worn a hat.
Me: I was really busy this mourning with my work that I didn't even bother.
Teacher: You don't need a hat. You need to air it out.
Girl #3: Yes he does. It's huge!
Teacher: no it's not.
Girl #3: You should of worn make up to cover it.
Girl #4: What kind of guy wears makeup?
Girl #3: Some of my guy friends wear makeup but they're gay. Haha
Me: Good thing I'm not gay.
Girl #3: Are you sure about that?
Me: If I was gay then I would have worn make up.
Girl #3: yeah...
Bottom line is if I had some type of medication that removed bug bites from my skin, then I would use it in a heart beat. A bump on my head isn't my biggest concern at the moment, which is weird to see that other people care. A mosquito bite will go away in a couple of days, but my grade's precedence is crucial today. Happy to see I earned 100 points.
Girl #1: Oh my god, what's that bump on your forehead?
Me: Oh this, I got a mosquito bite yesterday.
Girl #1: What happened?
Me: I was playing basketball and I feel this slight pinch on my face. I said to myself, "what the heck." This mosquito was buzzing next to my eye.
Girl #1: That is really big.
Me: I know right. It's so weird.
Girl #1: did you get hit in the head?
Me: no it was a mosquito bite.
I walk towards my group to participate and gave my teacher my portfolio.
Girl #2: Potential isn't sexy anymore. Haha (When we did introductions in the first weeks of school, the teacher made us choose an adjective to associate with our name. I choose sexy.)
Girl #3: I think he heard you. Haha
Me: How so? I want to know. I always want to improve myself.
Girl #3: that bump is huge!
Me: I know right. You girls have long hair compared to mines. Don't you girls hate it when you have bad hair days?
Girl #3: Yeah... You should have covered it up? You should have worn a hat.
Me: I was really busy this mourning with my work that I didn't even bother.
Teacher: You don't need a hat. You need to air it out.
Girl #3: Yes he does. It's huge!
Teacher: no it's not.
Girl #3: You should of worn make up to cover it.
Girl #4: What kind of guy wears makeup?
Girl #3: Some of my guy friends wear makeup but they're gay. Haha
Me: Good thing I'm not gay.
Girl #3: Are you sure about that?
Me: If I was gay then I would have worn make up.
Girl #3: yeah...
Bottom line is if I had some type of medication that removed bug bites from my skin, then I would use it in a heart beat. A bump on my head isn't my biggest concern at the moment, which is weird to see that other people care. A mosquito bite will go away in a couple of days, but my grade's precedence is crucial today. Happy to see I earned 100 points.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Movie Review: Dragon Ball Evolution
Let's get this straight off the bat. I'm not a colossal fan of the Dragon Ball series from its range of books, television shows, and merchandise. However, I find its characters to be appealing for what it is. There are many outrageous colorful battles across plains of land that demolish anything in the way. The unique Super Saiyan concept that gives thrills of praising excitement from the audience. A mix of comedy and drama intensifies the interpretation of good versus evil. Those are some examples of why I believe Dragon Ball is a popular series among many people, through my own interpretation. Yet I didn't see much of that in the big screen adaptation, Dragon Ball Evolution.
To sum it up, Lord Piccolo wants to summon the Dragon Shen Long so he can have a wish to do evil. In order for this to happen, he needs some dragon balls but fails to confinement by monks. Goku comes into the movie many years later and attains a dragon ball from his grandfather. He then goes to a party to see Chi Chi, however leaves his grandfather alone to be killed by Piccolo. Goku meets Bulma Briefs who is also searching for dragon balls so they set out to find Master Roshi. They get sidetracked for a moment where they find Yamcha as he joins the team. After Mai, Piccolo's servant, steals the dragon balls from them, Piccolo is a step ahead into conjuring Shen Long. After a climatic battle scene, without spoiling some parts, they defeat Piccolo and an ending insuring a sequel closes.
Now this is my opinion. I know some people that love the Dragon Ball series and believe it can never be made into a movie if preserved its content. I agree, yet I also believe with the right actors, budget, production team, and especially the director it can be a good movie adaptation. Stephen Chow's Shoalin Soccer was a great inspiration for me, because I thought he can make a good Dragon Ball movie as a producer. It didn't turn out that way after all.
In the movie, Goku could not act from who knows why. When his grandfather died he didn't show enough emotion as if he didn't really care that his grandfather just died. His relationship with Chi Chi isn't memorable to be in a film romances list. Justin Chatwin's translation of Goku is far beyond the Goku I adored in the series. Most of all, there was a particular scene of Goku meeting master Roshi for the first time. When Goku exchanged lines, he mumbled and jumbled his words. I don't know if they forgot to edit this movie, but there were also other inaccuracies. Chi Chi's party was the same day as Goku's birthday. Goku sneaked out of the house while his grandfather looked for him to give him an eighteenth birthday cake. When Goku and Chi Chi were alone at her place, Goku mentions that it's his birthday. He then tells her that every year he celebrates it with his grandfather. So why the heck would he leave his grandfather hanging, especially since it's his special eighteenth birthday and blatantly tell Chi Chi? Another inaccuracy is that they never explained how Piccolo got out of his magical prison to wreck havoc once more. On the other hand, Piccolo looks like the monster from Jeepers Creepers. Above all else, they never explained why the title itself has anything to do with evolution?
Therefore, the only enjoyment from this movie was my laughter at its horrible presentation of the Dragon Ball series. Maybe the writers messed up due to the strike, maybe the director was drunk making the film, and maybe some people were right all along. Dragon Ball was never meant to be made into a live-action film adaptation. There is one thing I do know. Jamie Chung, who portrays Chi Chi, is sensuous =)
Monday, May 11, 2009
Catchy Titles Grab Attention
To start off another typical day, I help two friends waxing their black Bimmer and silver Honda Accord. Burrito Azteca's Chicken Quesadillas' flavor doesn't fulfill my taste buds' needs, however load my stomach. Books and magazines are enjoyable to read with a Green Tea Frappuccino. Later in the day I find myself wandering the aisles of a book store. Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs! Wow! What the heck!
A woman neighboring me weaves into my thought released remark. "That is a catchy title," she mentions, as I grab the book from the shelf momentarily. My perception of this person was curiosity to see if there was more to meets the eye with her. I wouldn't want to end up on the mourning news, because I was kidnapped by a book store girl. A person's conversation is a river flow that can go either one way or to many paths. We formed a common ground instantly by our contribution of commonalities. It turns out she is an aspiring Journalist with experience in the acting field too. So was I. The conversation grew by our exchange of stories.
In a flash of light, we were sitting down at a table continuing the conversation. I'm not that easy, I have to get to know someone before we sit down together. She told me about a time when she was performing at Kaiser Permanente in comparison to a Patch Adams character. "In the middle of it my mind was blank so I improvised and ended up leaving the stage with no one knowing I messed up "she proclaimed. I like her good energy and expressive personality. I wonder if she's like this towards her family and friends. I couldn't stay for long, because I had to rejoin my homie at some point. In another flash of light, the book store announced it's closing soon while we were still talking. I left with my friend with a thought in mind. Catchy titles do grab attention.
A woman neighboring me weaves into my thought released remark. "That is a catchy title," she mentions, as I grab the book from the shelf momentarily. My perception of this person was curiosity to see if there was more to meets the eye with her. I wouldn't want to end up on the mourning news, because I was kidnapped by a book store girl. A person's conversation is a river flow that can go either one way or to many paths. We formed a common ground instantly by our contribution of commonalities. It turns out she is an aspiring Journalist with experience in the acting field too. So was I. The conversation grew by our exchange of stories.
In a flash of light, we were sitting down at a table continuing the conversation. I'm not that easy, I have to get to know someone before we sit down together. She told me about a time when she was performing at Kaiser Permanente in comparison to a Patch Adams character. "In the middle of it my mind was blank so I improvised and ended up leaving the stage with no one knowing I messed up "she proclaimed. I like her good energy and expressive personality. I wonder if she's like this towards her family and friends. I couldn't stay for long, because I had to rejoin my homie at some point. In another flash of light, the book store announced it's closing soon while we were still talking. I left with my friend with a thought in mind. Catchy titles do grab attention.
There's a Hero in All of Us
I haven't eaten at Burger King for a while now, so I don't even know what to order. How does a cheeseburger, some fries, and a milkshake sound good? My friends and I take turns talking to the intercom for our order of lunch. As soon as we arrive at the window, the worker passing over the food gives us an attitude. This person even looks like a creep from his non-facial expressions to the tone of his life-force energy drained voice. We leave the area but find an order missing in the bag. I had enough.
Primetime: What Would You Do? With host John Quiñones is a show, about creating perplex scenarios of people's daily lives. It observes human responses to the situation if they would either take action or leave it be. One particular segment involved a blind person buying dessert from a cashier who was also rude. When this person exchanged currency, the cashier didn't repay the correct amount of change. People in line witnessed what happened and some didn't step up to help the poor blind person. Those that did step up also influenced the rest of the reluctant customers to support the helper and the victim.
I confidently walked into the restaurant with an uplifting emotion mixed with adrenaline. I asked for the manager in charge to explain that we didn't attain an extra order and that we didn't even receive a receipt. The authoritative manager commanded the inscrutable employee to see the receipt and in response, our food was given. We exited the premises in patriotic glory.
Some people would have gone about their day without that order of food. Their reasoning could be that it isn't worth the trouble or that they are simply scared. I believe that we as human beings should take action, whether it's retrieving food for ourselves or helping a blind person acquire the proper change. After all we did pay for it. Even though, it's the principle that counts. If we can't stop the bleeding then how can we stop the wound?
If you would like to see videos of the Primetime series, What Would You Do? Follow the link below.
http://abcnews.go.com/whatwouldyoudo
Primetime: What Would You Do? With host John Quiñones is a show, about creating perplex scenarios of people's daily lives. It observes human responses to the situation if they would either take action or leave it be. One particular segment involved a blind person buying dessert from a cashier who was also rude. When this person exchanged currency, the cashier didn't repay the correct amount of change. People in line witnessed what happened and some didn't step up to help the poor blind person. Those that did step up also influenced the rest of the reluctant customers to support the helper and the victim.
I confidently walked into the restaurant with an uplifting emotion mixed with adrenaline. I asked for the manager in charge to explain that we didn't attain an extra order and that we didn't even receive a receipt. The authoritative manager commanded the inscrutable employee to see the receipt and in response, our food was given. We exited the premises in patriotic glory.
Some people would have gone about their day without that order of food. Their reasoning could be that it isn't worth the trouble or that they are simply scared. I believe that we as human beings should take action, whether it's retrieving food for ourselves or helping a blind person acquire the proper change. After all we did pay for it. Even though, it's the principle that counts. If we can't stop the bleeding then how can we stop the wound?
If you would like to see videos of the Primetime series, What Would You Do? Follow the link below.
http://abcnews.go.com/whatwouldyoudo
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Failure is a Lesson in Itself
The following names have been changed to protect the identities of those mentioned in this blog.
I'm about to get ready after five minutes! A shower cleanses my body and mouthwash waves around a storm in my mouth. My friend took my eye drops; I should have asked it back. I picked out a shirt that stands out, favorite jeans, brand new belt, black silk boxers, my trusty watch, a lucky necklace, diamond earrings matches me, black eyebrow piercing intact, corresponding shoes, and of course just plain socks. I go back into my room and try to remember what I forgot. Oh yes, my black jacket! I read in a book that the color black is a fashion precaution for men. My brother, his long time girlfriend, two friends enjoying a Friday night, and I leave the house. Yesterday, we went to a party.
One of the friends is named Anthony, whose own way of talking to people is opposite to mines. It was basically teaming Robin Williams' over the top high energy portrayals with Dave Chapelle's racial parodies. It's the same comedy game, but different style to perform. A cup halfway filled with Hennessey in my hand was ready to be consumed. I see the room filled with a lot of people: both male and female. Every guy I interacted with was cool and talking was at ease. The women were in groups preventing their instant to be alone. I approached many girls who were friendly and let's face it tipsy. At that moment I failed.
There were many windows of opportunities to take action yet I choked. I new what to do and how to do it; however, time freezes my skills as they melted. Girls bumped into me playfully, complimented my stand out shirt, praised my lucky necklace, engaged into the conversation, and their eyes were focused on me. I introduced Anthony to a couple of girls I was talking to. Talking to Kelly was cool; however, I felt that I didn't have enough time to build attraction. Anthony would talk to her friend, Cindy, and it was apparent we were not on the same page. Anthony was focused on his new companion while I was attempting to bring the group together in conversation. There was moments that I felt I needed his help and there was moments were I could of helped him too. Anthony's success later on was due to his own style of social interactions. They were hitting it off as old friends would. The girl I was talking to left the venue and that was the last time I would ever see her. I didn't have a chance to say goodbye or exchange numbers to further the conversation.
At home, I explained to my brother that I messed up. He simply asked, "What would your mentor say?" I told him that he would tell me it's not a big deal and move on. He asked me again, "What would your mentor say?" I announced that I had no idea. My brother explained, "He would tell you that it's your fault because you should have taken action by teaching Anthony how to be your style of a wing." I said it was common sense though. "It's not common sense; he was focused on his style without any regard to yours because you didn't teach him." Although Anthony had the option to help me, it was ultimately my mistake for not taking action in many ways. I knew he was right and I remembered something. There's nothing much you can do from failure than to learn from it and become better the next time. Lesson learned.
I'm about to get ready after five minutes! A shower cleanses my body and mouthwash waves around a storm in my mouth. My friend took my eye drops; I should have asked it back. I picked out a shirt that stands out, favorite jeans, brand new belt, black silk boxers, my trusty watch, a lucky necklace, diamond earrings matches me, black eyebrow piercing intact, corresponding shoes, and of course just plain socks. I go back into my room and try to remember what I forgot. Oh yes, my black jacket! I read in a book that the color black is a fashion precaution for men. My brother, his long time girlfriend, two friends enjoying a Friday night, and I leave the house. Yesterday, we went to a party.
One of the friends is named Anthony, whose own way of talking to people is opposite to mines. It was basically teaming Robin Williams' over the top high energy portrayals with Dave Chapelle's racial parodies. It's the same comedy game, but different style to perform. A cup halfway filled with Hennessey in my hand was ready to be consumed. I see the room filled with a lot of people: both male and female. Every guy I interacted with was cool and talking was at ease. The women were in groups preventing their instant to be alone. I approached many girls who were friendly and let's face it tipsy. At that moment I failed.
There were many windows of opportunities to take action yet I choked. I new what to do and how to do it; however, time freezes my skills as they melted. Girls bumped into me playfully, complimented my stand out shirt, praised my lucky necklace, engaged into the conversation, and their eyes were focused on me. I introduced Anthony to a couple of girls I was talking to. Talking to Kelly was cool; however, I felt that I didn't have enough time to build attraction. Anthony would talk to her friend, Cindy, and it was apparent we were not on the same page. Anthony was focused on his new companion while I was attempting to bring the group together in conversation. There was moments that I felt I needed his help and there was moments were I could of helped him too. Anthony's success later on was due to his own style of social interactions. They were hitting it off as old friends would. The girl I was talking to left the venue and that was the last time I would ever see her. I didn't have a chance to say goodbye or exchange numbers to further the conversation.
At home, I explained to my brother that I messed up. He simply asked, "What would your mentor say?" I told him that he would tell me it's not a big deal and move on. He asked me again, "What would your mentor say?" I announced that I had no idea. My brother explained, "He would tell you that it's your fault because you should have taken action by teaching Anthony how to be your style of a wing." I said it was common sense though. "It's not common sense; he was focused on his style without any regard to yours because you didn't teach him." Although Anthony had the option to help me, it was ultimately my mistake for not taking action in many ways. I knew he was right and I remembered something. There's nothing much you can do from failure than to learn from it and become better the next time. Lesson learned.
Friday, May 8, 2009
Who is Potential?
A wise man once asked me to ask myself this question: who are you? In the moment, I couldn't give myself a one hundred percent answer. Instead, I thought about my experiences and qualities. I thought about girls in particular because I had some bad experiences. I thought about my qualities such as funny, polite, outgoing, and caring. Aren't those good qualities? Why would I have bad experiences with women then? It's because I changed my approach and mind set of the "game". Even though, I am still the same person. So the main question still came into mind: who are you?
It takes time to really know who you are. I remember when I was in elementary school; the fattest kid would be me. I ate a lot at home because there was not much to do at the time, besides watch television and sleep. Heck, I was like this from five years old to fourteen years of age. In middle school, people from my elementary still saw me as the fat kid. However, the result of eating sweet and salty foods was not the only problem; I was very unsociable. I would be very shy when it came to joining groups in science class. The teacher would announce everyone to get into groups and the person left alone would be me. Groups were either made up of close friends or people daring enough to pose as a friend. I wish it was the teacher that decided; after all he would break them apart if they were too loud. There were times when I broke out of my shell like I was the Incredible Hulk. In presentations, I would try to out due any classmate by using originality and laughter to win over their approval. When I read a book out loud once in English class; I initiated my British impersonation in hope that people would enjoy it. I felt truly happy inside, until someone told me that it was stupid and not funny at all. I became try-hard and rude which became the opposite of my intentions. They even said I try to act "smart" with the tonality of my voice (showing sophistication), like I was running for election at the podium. What was the answer to my problems? How can I convey my personality without looking like a show off or loser?
I want to better myself and be social. I want to be the guy at parties who everyone wonders, "Who's that guy, I want to meet him?" I don't want to be a follower but a leader. I want the ability to talk to anyone about entirely anything from exchanging stories to opinions about the weather. So I ask myself through my experiences and qualities: who am I?
It takes time to really know who you are. I remember when I was in elementary school; the fattest kid would be me. I ate a lot at home because there was not much to do at the time, besides watch television and sleep. Heck, I was like this from five years old to fourteen years of age. In middle school, people from my elementary still saw me as the fat kid. However, the result of eating sweet and salty foods was not the only problem; I was very unsociable. I would be very shy when it came to joining groups in science class. The teacher would announce everyone to get into groups and the person left alone would be me. Groups were either made up of close friends or people daring enough to pose as a friend. I wish it was the teacher that decided; after all he would break them apart if they were too loud. There were times when I broke out of my shell like I was the Incredible Hulk. In presentations, I would try to out due any classmate by using originality and laughter to win over their approval. When I read a book out loud once in English class; I initiated my British impersonation in hope that people would enjoy it. I felt truly happy inside, until someone told me that it was stupid and not funny at all. I became try-hard and rude which became the opposite of my intentions. They even said I try to act "smart" with the tonality of my voice (showing sophistication), like I was running for election at the podium. What was the answer to my problems? How can I convey my personality without looking like a show off or loser?
I want to better myself and be social. I want to be the guy at parties who everyone wonders, "Who's that guy, I want to meet him?" I don't want to be a follower but a leader. I want the ability to talk to anyone about entirely anything from exchanging stories to opinions about the weather. So I ask myself through my experiences and qualities: who am I?
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